Posted by: Liza Rosenberg | August 29, 2008

My Son the Lactation Specialist

Picture the setting, if you will. It’s late August, and a certain, medium-sized high-tech company is running an onsite day camp for the children of employees. The Little One is among the campers, and he’s the youngest of the bunch. Lunch starts early for the young campers, and their parents are asked to join them for the meal. I find myself sitting next to the Little One at the boys table, as the kids have taken it upon themselves to separate by gender. A colleague sits farther down the table with his two sons, both of whom, have befriended the Little One. We are discussing the virtues of various vegetables and the importance of drinking water, when the Little One decides to change the subject.

“When I was a baby, I bit my mommy when my teeth grew in. But only when I was drinking.”

Cue raucous laughter from all adults in the vicinity while various inquisitive campers ask questions that the Little One is happy to answer.

Better than his passing interest in gynecology, I suppose…


  1. too, too, funny, that’s what kids are for…to embarass their parents…so their parents can embarass them when they are teenagers.

  2. Well, I found out that my kids turn out to be a very good tape recorder for all of our conversations and talks. The only problem using this capability is that the play button gets pressed in a random times and mostly the most unpredictable ones 😉

  3. That’s a riot! And THIS is why kids are so much fun!!! Yes, my 3 yr old’s comment on seeing daddy stepping out of the shower one day was, “Daddy! You have a WORM butt!!!” After falling over laughing, he said, “I’d prefer it be a snake!” She also loves to point out the anatomical differences between herself and I…pointing out that she only has “little boobies”. When I tell her they will be bigger someday she looks very seriously at them, then looks at me and says, “I sure HOPE so!”
    Of course her public admonishments to anyone she sees smoking can be a bit embarassing…”Mommy, look!!! She’s smoking! She’s gonna DIE!!!!”

  4. aaah, I love kids!

  5. What did Reagan say once? “Boys be boys”.

    Why have I jumped on the poor departed? Oh, all that crapola with these elections…

    Nice story anyhow. Cheers.

  6. My boys are not circumsized, which is rare in Israel. While we were warned by caring strangers that they will suffer for it when in the company of other naked boys, so far the common reaction is them looking emphatically at the other boys and going “uh oh, your parents decided to have your penis chopped a little and took away your foreskin, didn’t they?” Needless to say, it’s not my boys feeling bad about that small anatomical difference.
    Of course, we try to teach them not to make the other boys feel bad about it, but like you said, boys will be boys and say what’s on their mind when they’re just 4-5 years old.

  7. Hee hee, that’s too funny! I had to smile at that one 🙂

  8. I can’t post the things my kids have been saying on the subject.

  9. me gusta mucho tu blog t visito todos los dias visita el mio y si t gusta deja un comentario y intercambiamos los links

  10. Ha, ha! I’m surprised he can remember that. Unless, of course, your reaction made an impression on him!!

  11. That’s hysterical, and sounds very much like something my kids would have come out with.

  12. […] else sensing a fetish pattern here? At least he was practicing his […]

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